Do you write screenplays? I do (so does my cat), it seems everybody does now. It used to be a joke that every cab driver, waiter, plumber in Los Angles was working on a screenplay. Well now it's nation wide. Wondering why your waitress isn't bringing your check? She's in the back arguing the merits of Syd Field vs. Joseph Campbell with the bus boy. The notebook that the East Asian guy at the Jiffy Mart is always scribbling in? It's his treatment for an action adventure involving lose nukes and rogue CIA agents in the mountains of Tora Bora.
Aspiring unproduced screenwriters are now the fastest growing sub-culture group, having passed out both gun nuts and wing nuts. In fact if current growth trends continue unproduced screenwriters will surpass both JFK conspiracy theorists and the Black Helicopter/Alien Abduction people, in less than five years.
And there's the rub. While there’re are a infinite supply of black helicopters and alien spacecraft, Hollywood only puts out so many movies a year, and horror of horror the number is going down!
So Hollywood, avert this upcoming social crisis by buying some scripts! You think that you're getting bad service at restaurants now? Just wait until the day when the entire staff are in the back doing a table read of the Sou chef buddy cop movie.
Along with the three “winners’ listed to the left, I have some more “conventional” scripts as well. Inquire within, as they say at the fancy pants antique store.
More Rubbish To Follow.
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